“Wow,” he stopped us on the street, a completely normal looking man, probably in his mid-30′s with no obvious signs of mental illness. “I’ve never stopped anyone before to say this, but you two make an absolutely stunning couple.” I looked around to see if the restraints had left marks or if he was frothing at the mouth, but no, he was wearing an Armani suit and had Gucci loafers on. Par for the course for the Gold Coast, and all the more confusing because it didn’t appear that he had any reason to be kind do us. He didn’t WANT anything from us.
“Thanks,” I said uncomfortably, smiling as brightly as I could, because I’d been taught to thank people NO MATTER WHAT. Even the time that my “friend” had said that “the weight looked better on her” when she realized we weighed the same amount, I uttered a brief “thanks.” It’s the curse of being a Midwesterner. We’re annoyingly polite.
The third or fourth person in as many blocks that we’re looking for a handout or a blow-job had, out of the clear blue summer sky, stopped us to compliment us on how beautiful a couple we made. Each made mention that they “didn’t normally say as much to strangers” and each time, I uncomfortably smiled and laughed. I couldn’t tell them the truth.
These people were calling my brother and I the next hot couple. My BROTHER. Whom I love dearly….like a brother. We weren’t holding hands or acting lovey-dovey because I’m pretty sure the last time I hugged him, I was three years old and I’ve never considered grabbing his arm like they do in the movies. Which meant that we were simply walking next to each other.
What’s even weirder is that we look alike.
It was sort of like the time when I was in Chinatown with my dad. My father, I need to add here to make this story even more hysterical and awkward, would prefer it if I lived in high necked dresses that went down to my feet all of the time. All I need to do to embarrass him is to say “vagina” and he’s bright red and sputtering. But we were in Chinatown and I was buying a kimono and he was waiting uncomfortably at the front of the shop for me while the saleslady tried to find something to fit my Western-like proportions. Finally, my kimono in hand, I made my way to the register to make my dad buy it for me. Because, obviously, I was in high school and that’s what you do.
While he was paying, she leaned into me and winked. “Is that your BOYFRIEND? You two make a BEAUTIFUL couple.” Well, he overheard that, turned as dark red as I’d ever seen him and I think a part of him died right there. He’s 33 years older than I am, mind you, The Internet. Maybe she was just being nice, I don’t know, but it was not only disgusting, but awful too.
This got me thinking about what people perceive as beautiful. Certainly, while I am married now and I’ve been out with my husband alone many more times than I’ve ever been out with my brother or my father alone, not a single person has stopped to tell us that we make a beautiful couple. He and I look nothing alike. I’m dark where he’s light and he’s angular where I’m square. Damn, I’m making me sound like I look like a swarthy box while he looks like a dainty triangle, but you know. I don’t think we make an unattractive couple.
Symmetry has long since been thought to be a clear sign of beauty, weirdly enough. People are drawn to faces that are symmetrical. Certain studies also show that the more average the face (average being defined as without glaring, noticeable features. No bulbous noses, gigantic ears, lopsided eyes), the more attractive they are. The last study that I found showed that what people found MOST attractive were the computer-generated images that they’d created out of a database of pictures. In other words, most people found that the computer-generated images were the most beautiful. How’s that for unrealistic standards, Toy With Me-ers?
I found nothing that would explain why everyone seemed to think that two people who looked so very much alike made such a beautiful couple. The only people I’ve ever thought that made a particularly gorgeous couple were those that were separately stunning, like Brad and Angelina, and never have I thought “wow, they just…go together.” Then again, I’m not in the habit of examining other couples or really looking at other people as twosomes unless I’m thinking about maybe having The Sex with them. Which, obviously not what I was doing with my brother (or my father) that day. The two of us have about as much chemistry as I do when I interact with a teaspoon.
I wonder what other saw that day when they saw the two of us walking down the street because for the life of me I cannot imagine anything other than siblings who were barely tolerating each other. Apparently, no, that wasn’t what they saw. So, rather than trying to build a paltry writing empire, I’m thinking that I should really go into couples modeling with my brother. As long as I don’t have to, you know, actually TOUCH him or anything, maybe we could both make some serious modeling cash and retire on our respective luxury yachts. But I’ll be fucked if I have to kiss him or anything. Because that is so not the way it is in my family.
So, Toy With Me-ers, what do you think about hot couples? What makes a hot couple?
Possibly related goodness:
{ 24 comments… read them below or add one }
“…in his mid-30’s with no obvious signs of mental illness.”
LMAOOOOOO!
PASSION! Passionate couples are incredibly hot. The husband can be 400 pounds with acne while the wife is toothless with stringy hair…if there’s passion, they instantly become hot and envy-worthy in my book…..even if they are passionately arguing.
FrankieNichelle – Passion, most definitely.
When you see a couple who despite being in a crowded room at opposite ends, seek each other out, make eye contact and share a knowing smile. There’s an obvious connection there which I find extremely hot.
Trust me, the only passion we had was the passion of HATRED. Bwahaha! But yes, passion makes a hot couple, for sure.
Oh no!! I didn’t see that coming. That cracks me up. Beautiful couples respect and enjoy each other. At least to me. ~S
Confidence. If both people have confidence in the way they are walking, in themselves, in each other. It just makes them attractive, as if they know something that no one else does.
I never get stopped for myself or as a couple, but I get a lot of compliments on the kiddos.
Beautiful couples look happy and joyful together…like they’re in their own little happy bubble together.
My husband and I look alike. Like, enough so that at his father’s funeral, multiple out of touch family members came up to me and apologized for my loss, calling me HIS SISTER’S NAME.
Around the time of our wedding, the hubs and I were both sporting shaggy dirty-blonde hair, ‘causing us to look ::thatmuchmore:: alike, and never have we been told more often what a lovely couple we made.
Once upon a time, I was in Arizona, dressed nicely, walking down the street. A shaggy looking hippie in a baseball cap came up to me and the guy I was with, stopped us, and said “I don’t often say this, but you two look like you were meant to be together.” Despite not being a mid-westerner, I said thank you.
The guy I was walking with, my live-in boyfriend of four years (who had dumped me two weeks earlier) also thanked him.
Anyway, as far as hot is concerned, I think that confidence is key. In oneself and in each other.
Maybe people really like couples who look alike. I’ve only gotten complimented about being part of a great looking couple when I was out with a boyfriend in the early 1990s: the server at our usual coffee place said we looked great together because we both wore the best glasses.
Aunt Becky you are hot with anybody you walk the streets with! Uh, not walk the streets like THAT, but uh, well you know what I mean!
Not so much looks makes a couple good together. It’s the way they interact with one another. Do they seem at ease with one another and those around them? Do they seem happy when they not only look at one another but admire the scenery.
Isn’t it Darwinian theory that people are attracted to people who look like them so they can live forever in their look-a-like spawn? Maybe people outside the couple are somehow acknowledging that when they compliment you and your brother for being a hot couple.
Either that or they think incest is best.
Somebody once told me that my sister and I made a great couple. Of course, he was homeless and had his hands down his pants. He also threw and orange at us.
My definition of a hot couple: passion, laughter, comfort and ease.
My husband and I, who look nothing alike, were often told we were “the cutest couple” when we were dating. Of course, that was back in the stone age, and we haven’t been told that in some time. We do have nice looking kids though.
One time when I was with my dad we ate lunch at BW3′s he was a frequent customer. They took a picture of my dad and I and hung it on the wall with other frequent customers. The next time we were in there they had cut me out of said picture. Why? because the waitress didn’t want my dads girlfriend to see him in a picture with his “other girlfriend”. I was pissed and disgusted I mean the man is my father come on!!! As for an attractive couple I to think it is familiarity with each other or ease.
I am crackin up though about Heathers comment
Miss Spoken never fails to have me snorting. Awesome.
Hot couples – indeed, it’s passion. Ever look at two people across the room and think, “Holy shit – I’d love to burn in the middle of that fire!” ??? THAT’S passion. You should never settle for a relationship without it. Maybe that’s why people looked at you and your brother like a hot couple – family bonding, a talent for hating one another’s guts as kids…that’s still a deep bond.
I make couples hot…. wait what? That is such a hard one to judge. Pass….
My husband and I get told that we are a beautiful couple/look perfect together, etc. in a roughly direct proportion to the number of times that we get told that we look related… so I think you might have something there.
I’ve been there. When I was 18, I went with my dad to work before heading back to college. When I was away, one of his co-workers told my dad he had a hot wife. I am 36 years younger than my father. ew.
I actually had a similar experience to your kimono experience. I went out to get my navel pierced on my 18th birthday, and the piercing guy (piercer?) asked if my father, who was driving me to and from my appointment, was my husband. My first thought was that I must look like a serious gold-digger or something, because my dad isn’t particularly young-looking for his age. I realised later, though that probably what catches peoples’ attention is that we’re both tall (in the realm of 6 foot), and people always seem to think that tall people only date tall people (which is amazingly not true…most of the really tall guys I know date some of the shortest girls I’ve ever seen)
Hot couples simply are. There is no rhyme or reason to it.
I don’t even think about it…
Maybe there’s something wrong with me.
I swear that kimono story was on a TV movie with that girl, Amanda Bynes.
What about interracial couples? My boyfriend is tall, lean, and white. I am a petite, curvy, part-Asian brunette. When my bf and I were 18, one of our friends, who's 30, told us we would 'have a strong son' because of my mixed blood. This friend happened to be dating a girl who is alot more Asian than me. I think it's sort of wierd when two people in a couple look the same. My bf and his ex used to get mistaken as brother and sister LMFAO at least I don't look like his sister …
anyway, I totally agree with most of the commentors about Passion being what makes a couple look great together! Oh and by the way, alot of people don't seem to think I look Asian at all and they mistake me for a Hispanic girl, (apparently because of my "face"), and my ex that I dated for almost a year is Hispanic. The first time I met his friend Jen with him she exclaimed :"Oh! She looks just like you!" (o o) My ex has a sister that looks like him and I don't look anything like her. Some people need glasses, I guess.