Posts by author:

The Queen Of Everything

When Stupid People Try To Have Sex

January 12, 2011

You know what I like to think about sometimes, you guys? I like to think about how stupid people have sex. I should probably clarify that I don’t so much “like” to think about stupid people having sex,  it’s more of one of those awful thoughts that pop into my head sometimes and I can’t [...]

Read the full article →

Why My Vagina Is Steaming

January 5, 2011

My vagina has been feeling really stressed out lately, you guys. Maybe it’s the crush of the holiday season, maybe it’s the two periods a month it’s forced to endure, maybe it’s worried about global warming, I have no idea, but I know it’s really sad and upset and just like everybody else, it could [...]

Read the full article →

The Cuddle Party Phenomenon

December 15, 2010

The other day I was scouring the Interwebz for Toy with Me topics when I came across something that intrigued me:  Cuddle Parties. Have you guys ever heard of these, because I haven’t and it just smacks of some kind of crazy hippy dippy new- age crap to me. But let’s not be prejudiced, and [...]

Read the full article →

The Christmas Gift Guide For Perverts

December 8, 2010

I think we’ll make my Gift Guide for Perverts an annual Toy With Me tradition seeing as I did one last year.  I like my routines and traditions and lately my Xanax.  They make me feel safe, like it would almost be okay to stop hiding under my couch.  ALMOST.  So here is mine for [...]

Read the full article →

The Dreaded Public Restroom

December 1, 2010

Well Toy with Mes, it’s that time of year again. Soon the holiday season will be upon us, which means that those of us who are not hermits hiding in their basement on the computer will all be going out into…da-da-duuunnnnn… THE PUBLIC.  And eventually, while we’re out IN PUBLIC, we’re going to have to [...]

Read the full article →

LELO SORAYA – The Bar Has Been Raised

November 24, 2010

Oh Toy with Mes, do I have a treat for you! Her name is “SORAYA” and she is part of LELO’s brand new line called INSIGNIA–all ergonomic, stylish,  luxurious, and fully waterproof toys. You need one.  You do. If you’re a huge fan of LELO toys like me, then your vagina is already one spoiled [...]

Read the full article →

Have You Ever Wanted To Be Spanked?

November 24, 2010

I come to you this week with a new perspective on life, Toy with Mes. You see, I’ve been facing some minor, yet nonetheless incredibly scary health problems. It’s been one thing after another and I’ve been feeling really shitty–like a rag doll getting tossed all over the place. Where do I begin? My hormones [...]

Read the full article →

← Previous Entries

Next Entries →