My Husband Wants To Have A Threesome

You know what my husband wants?

A threesome.

I know, I know, everyone’s husband wants a threesome, but the kind of threesome my husband wants does not involve me and another chick.

No, no, Toy with Mes.  He wants it to be with…

Wait for it…

A dog!

I am completely not serious.

No. He wants it to be with another man (mostly because he’s not a dog person).

Up until last week, I had no idea that this is kind of unusual. Apparently it is! Last week someone suggested that perhaps a lot of guys aren’t admitting this is a fantasy of theirs for fear of sounding gay.  I would explain his feelings on the subject to you, but I’m going to save it for him to explain.  Instead, I’m going to share my thoughts on the subject because I am infinitely more interesting than he is.

In theory, this threesome thing sounds like a good idea for a lot of reasons:

  • For one, sometimes in a relationship, that new relationship buzz wears off and you kind of get settled into things and you don’t get that whole super exciting new guy sex feeling anymore.  People try to get that back through role play and going to bars and pretending to pick each other up, but this is a new twist on that.  This is a way to get that new guy sex–without cheating!  HUH!  In my case, it’s even encouraged! Double HUH.  Sign me up!
  • If one penis is good, two must be better, right?  I’ve taken inventory and I can definitely accommodate more than one guest at the hotel at once.
  • Sometimes I get distracted while doing the sexy time.  More people = more stuff going on = more stuff to keep me focused on the task at hand(s).
  • Group sex.  It just sounds naughty and fun!
  • As it happens, I’ve already got the perfect person all picked out for us.  It’s my husband’s friend who plays the drums in his garage band.  Readers of my personal blog know exactly who I’m talking about and trust me you guys–he’s fucking hotter than Hades in August. In fact, many of my readers would gladly throw down for a chance at him.  He’s that strong, blue collar type with the muscles and the perfect hairless chest and the arms and the tanned skin and…oh dear.  I’m working myself into a kerfuffle again.

The problem is that nothing is black and white.  As many reasons as I can think of to get “double teamed,” I can think of an equal number NOT to go through with it…

  • First, I worry about the emotional implications such an act would have on my relationship with Dreamy Drummer Boy.  I think I’ve told you guys before that I’ve never been able to separate love and sex, and so to have this kind of encounter with my husband’s BFF–who I’ve known for 14 years now and love already–would probably wreak havoc on my emotional life.  That’s not to mention the awkwardness on band practice nights.
  • He’s married-ish to a psychotic alcoholic who could totally kick my ass and would love to have a reason to.
  • DDB is physically terrified of me.  If I even so much as reach for him to brush something off his shoulder, he winces and shrinks away like I’m made of flaming cat shit.  I’m serious.  He about yells “GAH!” if I even get within foot of him.  His hands fly out to his sides like he’s trying not to get any of me on him.
  • Birth control!  Unlike hubby, DDB has not had the pleasure of having a vasectomy.

It’s very sad because I think I/we could show him a pretty good time.  You know if I had the balls to actually go through with it, but I don’t think I could.  I can talk a good game and fantasize about being the type of woman who has a wild sex life like that, but if actually faced with the moment, I’m not so sure.

So then I got to thinking that it just can’t be with someone I already know and trust and will undoubtedly see again.  Perhaps a stranger instead of dreamy drummer boy.  But then there’s no free lunch there either!

  • What happens when I develop feelings for New Guy.  That could be really messy.
  • STDs!
  • What if my husband, for all his fantasizing, discovers he does not like it and gets jealous or hurt?  I cannot risk damaging our marriage and relationship for one evening of woo-hoo.
  • And what happens after everyone cums? How awkward is that? Does everyone just sort of get up, put their clothes back on and walk away? I mean, the guy doesn’t sleep over, right, because if they do, we’re going to need a bigger bed because a Queen size is just not big enough for three adults and I really need my sleep.
  • It’s a lot of work constantly screening and picking up strangers.  As it stands I don’t have time to put my laundry away.

And then my mind moves away from practical, emotional concerns toward the ridiculous.

  • Knowing me, I’d either run giggling into the bathroom as soon as my panties came off, leaving them standing there, quite literally with their dicks in their hands, OR I’d be totally mortified as soon as people started touching me and like, freak out.  It’s bad enough when I leave my husband with blue balls.  This is TWICE as bad.
  • If by some miracle I actually got past the initial awkwardness, I’d probably play party hostess and make sure everyone is having a good time and check to see if anyone needs anything and if anyone is feeling left out and so on.  I would be my typical self and that means I’d be overly concerned with everyone else’s welfare–especially the “honored guest.”
  • The epic nervousness means I would also be distracted by horrifying thoughts like, “OMG!  What if I pee?” or “Did I shave well enough?”
  • What if I try to do some sort of fancy maneuver and fall off the bed or accidentally hit someone in the head or kick them in the face?
  • Holy hell, what if I have…The Gas?

Oh, lord.  I am way too much of a spaz for this.  I am not made for exciting things.

Before you all get mad at me because I’m being a Negative Nancy, realize that I’m not totally closed to the idea, it’s just that I recognize my anxiety disorder would preclude me from actually enjoying it to the fullest.  I would not be able to just let go, sit back, and enjoy it!  If you’ve been paying attention, you would know that’s not how I roll: if there’s something to worry about, I will find that something and obsess on it.  It’s one of my many talents, actually.   It’s part of what makes me a super special snowflake.

So, yes. I’m not going to say it will never happen.  It’s just gonna take gallons of wine and an astronomical alignment.

But enough about me.  I want to hear about you guys now. Have any of you TWMs ever had an MMF threesome?  How did that work out?  Did you have The Gas or did you cause the end of one or more relationships or did you accidentally kick someone in the face?

**Catch the male perspective tomorrow with a special guest post by: Ken Gilbert!  (Crissy’s husband)

Photo source – Ken Gilbert

Toy With Me About Toy With Me

Comments

  1. Hi! I know this is an older blog, but I thought I’d weighin my experience. Hubby and I have engaged in a MMF with a close friend on multiple occasions. If anyone has any questions feel free to ask. By the way, we are very normal people. Both have advance degree and professional careers, not to mention, kids. It’s our private little bedroom secret that we enjoy, but yes, the the things mentioned in the blog can be a problem if you don’t get your emotions in check. I too am a worryier.

  2. Hello. I have a similar issue with my husband. He has a traumatic brain injury from when he was 6 months old and hit the windshield. (Now, not putting the child in the car seat would be considered child abuse). Due to this injury, he was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. One of the side effects of this is the male version of nymphomania. This is not a fun side effect even though lots of his female friends think it would be great. He says he is going to do everything sexual that he thinks would be fun (but nothing illegal) since the doctors told him he may only have 7 to 10 years to live. This is where the issues arise, for me anyways. He wants to have a threesome with a man and one with a woman and one with a shemale. He is bi-curious and was with a man once. He keeps saying that he wants these with me and that I should want to do anything and everything I can to make him happy no matter what and not tell him no. I understand this, but am having a very difficult time agreeing with these things. I find them odd and not normal. I know people do these things and if that’s what makes them happy, fine. He also says he wants to do these to spice things up as they are boring. He says if I won’t make him happy by doing these things, then he will find someone who will, stating that he already has people who said they would do all of them for him. I’m so confused as to what to do. I want to make him happy, but I have the feeling that if he really loved me, he wouldn’t make me do something I don’t really want to do. He also says it’s not cheating because both of us have to be in the room when it happens, whether we participate or just watch. I see it as cheating because it’s with someone other than the one I took vows with. Please help.

    • I’m not a relationship expert by any means but as one woman to another Jennifer I think each person in a relationship should always have the best interests of their partner in mind. Being asked to do something you’re uncomfortable with is not a fair request especially when an ultimatum is given. We all have gut instincts and I would go with yours in this situation.

  3. Pleasing to find semonoe who can think like that

  4. We do this once or twice a month. My hubby is very confident and loves to see me being pleased, its a turn on having him watch. We switch back and fourth ie.. one inside me while I suck the other. It is a huge turn on for me when I see two men laying there totally satisfied afterwards! I think we have a special relationship, I've watched him have sex with other women and loved it too. We usually have our best sex after the new lover leaves, we are both so incredibly turned on for days after. I suggest you try it if you are both secure enough, its the most fun I've ever had in bed!

  5. I am trying to get my wife to have a 3some with me and a guy we hang around with but she feels like she is cheating any suggestions

  6. chopperpapa says:

    From personal experience, the trip never turns out the way it looked in the brochure…over promise, under deliver.

  7. sixnettles says:

    To me, a threesome with two guys and a girl makes the most sense. One penis, one shot, two holes? Nah. Two guys and one girl makes way more sense.

    And from what I have heard from those that have, ahem, partaken in the MMF activity, typically the guys in a MMF threesome are not bi and not interested in each other – whereas in the the FFM threesome, all too frequently the M gets a bit left out after the girls go bi-bi.

  8. I think a threesome, of any combination, could be great, IF none of the parties involved had much emotional attachment. So. not for hubby/wife teams or long term monogamous couples.

    • When you're in a long term monogamous relationship don't you think at a certain point you might find something new & completely risque' would be welcomed?

  9. I would have thought feeling negative about yourself after the fact would have pertained more to a female in a FFM situation. The more I think about this though I certainly understand reasons why. Thanks for sharing your opinion :)

  10. Justin Latina says:

    Every man dreams of re-capturing the ability he once had to so completely objectify the incredible woman who eventually became the mother of his children / dependable best friend.
    I have actually had this fantasy, though mine was always at the end of a relationship and always skewed toward the side of wanting to watch someone else fuck her. The thought being that, I now harbor enough resentment and hatred that the only way she'll ever be hot again is if she's completely indulges her inner whore and allows herself to be defiled in the most offensive way that SHE can think of.
    For a married man, it would seem to be a controlled experiment in destroying the sanctity of marriage. There is no higher pursuit in my mind. (I get a boner just thinking about it!)
    In case you were wondering, this is a big vote in the "FOR" column. It may either end your marriage or tighten the bond to an impenetrable degree.
    Either way, I'm disappointed that I never learned to play the drums and I definitely want a copy of the home movie it will inevitably spawn.

    • So you believe it's an all or nothing adventure? " It may either end your marriage or tighten the bond to an impenetrable degree. " If this truly is the case how many people do you think would question the risk? Or be willing to take it?

    • it's interesting you say "re-capturing the ability he once had to so completely objectify the incredible woman." i hadn't considered the fact that at the beginning, the VERY beginning of the relationship, the players truly DO see each other in a PURELY objective way.

      There is nothing but the image, the smell, the taste, the touch, the sound of their voice. it all begins with sensation, and sensation is objective by nature.

      only objects and matter can be sensed.

  11. pandadementia says:

    I've had quite a few FFM threesomes and one MMF threesome. Some of them worked, some of them didn't. The ones that DID work worked because we were all laid back, all had a sense of humor about it, didn't have any inflated expectations about it, just went with the flow and had fun. The ones that DIDN'T work were because one (or more) of the parties went into it for the wrong reasons (wanting to please their partner, etc) or had jealousies and hang ups that prevented them from letting go and having fun.
    With my MMF threesome, I knew both of the guys (previous sex partners) but they didn't know each other. It worked out fabulously, I had A LOT of fun, and so did they.
    I would suggest that if you have some reservations and some worries about it (which it sounds like you do), that you DON'T do it. Your hang ups will probably prevent you from having fun and it will put a strain on your marriage instead of bringing you and your hubby closer together.
    Good luck! :)

  12. Don't do it.

    The drummer dude is totally hot for you. The avoidance is his way of trying to suppress this and not wreck his friendship with your husband… You say you have the hots for him too. Disaster!

    Then there is the associating sex with love thing, which I can relate to.

    It would be easier than falling off a rock to end up with very strong feelings for him, maybe even marriage wrecking feelings.

    • I'm pretty sure "drummer dude" has been ruled out for those very reasons. Having said that, it wouldn't hurt if Crissy shared his info with us ;)

    • the drummer absolutely does have the hots for crissy.

      1) she's only ever been sweet as pie to him in the 14 years they've known each other.
      2) have you seen how ridiculously hot she is?
      3) he is (and has been for too long) going through the wringer with his own wife, who basically treats him like dog shit.
      4) her ass! for the love of god…

  13. i have never been involved in a threesome, but i do have a desire to do so with my office mate and his hot wife.

  14. connieemeraldeyes says:

    In reality, they kind of get jelous of each other. One probably has a bigger penis than the other one. What if the new guy does, will it make your husband feel jelous, or if you ack like you really like the new guy, he will start to feel jelous.
    Then if you do it with someone else, is he going to suggest bringing in a woman next time. Would that bother you. Plus I would be afraid of getting Aids. Will you request a HIV test.

    • You bring up a very valid point no one has touched on yet. I wonder how many people think about, ask for, or provide information concerning HIV testing.

  15. Oh my holy threesomes! How have I not found you before today? Love this post, your blog, and mostly I love your tagline. Um? 3some, sign me up! As long as it's JT or Leonardo (I had an awesome pregnancy dream about him and he is hung, I'm sure of it).

  16. Jersey Girl says:

    I am with you Chris. I over think it too. But Mr. Toy with Me is correct I think they are called "cuckloids". Not sure of the spelling. You are lucky you can talk about it with your husband. I fantasize about being with two men while I am trying to climax with my man.

    I do believe that once you go there you can never turn back though. Keep us posted.

    • Have you ever talked to your partner about your fantasy? Whether you want to keep it a fantasy or make it reality, communicating sexual desires are a way of knowing your partner better and creating a stronger bond.

      • Jersey Girl says:

        Thank you and yes we talk alot more then we ever used to. I agree wholeheartedly with you about that. We have just started using toys and such…this is a big step for my husband. He is a WASP you know…typically missionary.

  17. Having experienced both sorts of threesomes, I would advise you to give it a try. There is nothing to compare to the feeling of having 2 men worship you. As long as you are playing with straight guys, they will be doing everything in their power to make sure they are pleasing you.

    If it were me, I wouldn't invite your hubby's bff into bed with the two of you. That is playing with fire. If things were to go badly, hurting that friendship is something that you and your husband would always regret.

    If you want any more personal details (our rules, how we find people, etc… ) shoot me an e-mail. I'm not exactly the shy type!

    • Good call on inviting the friend. Considering the feelings and emotions that may stem from a threesome having a friend participate could jeopardize that relationship.

    • You should write a post on your knowledge on the topic. Im sure there are many others out there who would appreciate the first hand knowledge to alow them to make their decision and to help them plan the act so it can be carried out in the best possible way.

  18. In a Wicked Land, in a different Wicked time, prior to He Who Loves All Things Wicked, I experienced a really positive MMF threesome, BUT there was no relationship tie between any of us. I am totally able to disassociate sex and emotions, as were the guys involved. It was a really great experience and I look back at it as something I would not change. I wish you much luck in your decision making process!! The most important thing is to do whatever you are comfortable with!

    • You sexy little vixen you ;) Having no relationship ties to any parties involved would definitely make it less complicated I would think as far as feelings go. There technically is no actual relationship that can get damaged.

  19. I think this is more than just the sex aspect. Crissy's husband as photographer has voyeur tendencies. I think he wants to capture the beautiful facial expressions you make during sex. I think when one is making love to their spouse the main concern is the pleasure of your spouse. Kind of difficult to pleasure someone and take pictures at the same time.

  20. Talking about performanc anxiety, think about it from a guy’s point of view. In the MMF situation, not only does he have to be great for the woman, he’s got to outdo the other guy. It’s in our competitive nature.

    And there’s the whole comparison thing. Two naked guys are going to compare equipment. It’s a fact. What if drummer dude is a) Also HUGE or b)tiny.

    Lastly, there’s the whole touching thing. For whatever reason, two women touching is really great, but two guys touching, Not so much. And as a guy, I don’t want my stuff touching another guy’s stuff. EVER. I’d need therapy.

    • O M G, U don't find 2 guys touching themselves as a big nasty turn on?

      Alrighty then………….we are diverse after all. I can dig.

  21. Interesting conjecture. But what if some aspect of the other male turns out to be a turn off when the clothes get taken off? For example, you mentioned worrying about whether you had shaved properly down south (paraphrased). You see, for me the thought of making love to a female without that womanly asset (and looking like a little gir) is a turn-off of major proportions. After you've gotten undressed, it might be awkward to then back out (???)

    • Best to discuss grooming habits ahead of time I guess. If the third party is not someone you know this shouldn't be hard to discuss. Or at a swingers party/club you can see first.

  22. I had a roommate that did actually go through with it. Her boyfriend and his roommate. She said that after everyone came (except her because it was too busy for her to do so)… it was awkward as hell. AND she felt like a dirty slut afterward too. AND she was incredibly sore- not in a "had a good workout" way. Seriously, when she came home the next morning, she looked like she'd been gang raped. Oh, and her boyfriend's roommate started stalking her afterward. So the whole bang you and your friend never appealed to me after that.

  23. My experience with this sort of thing is that the fantasy is way better than the reality. However, many people do seem to enjoy it. My problem was the same as you said about separating love and sex. I can't seem to do it.

    If I know one thing, it's this: stay away from drummer dude. Doing this with him will change everything about your relationship. Keep your fantasy about him alive. I would bet it's better than the reality.

  24. Thanks for sharing the clip. Love him!

  25. Personally I like focusing on one person. I had a friend do a MFF and he said it was too much work. It looked good on film, but in real life it was a different story.

  26. I can give you an evolutionary biologist's explanation which will make the MMF seem far more natural. It is actually rather common for a man to be aroused by the thought of another male fucking his mate. Why? His sex drive is aroused by the competition. His sperm want to dominate the other male's sperm, so his drive is heightened to mate repeatedly. Also, his orgasm is more forceful and pleasurable when he is competing with the presence of another male. This is why men can often have repeat performances at swinger parties.

    Of course, this doesn't necessarily do a damn thing for the woman. I'm just saying that it's a perfectly natural feeling for a man.

  27. Oh my gosh !! How about this.. Your hubby and my boyfriend can have at it and we will just watch and drink Margaritas!! cause .. My mister can be a be gay sometimes too!! But only if your Mister wears your skinny jeans.

  28. It's definitely not something to jump into without prior thought and communication with your partner.

  29. joeinvegas says:

    that luxury hotel, no kids around, jacuzzi, mood lighting, luxurious bed and room service would probably be pretty good with just Mr. and you (without anyone else)

  30. I have had the pleasure of FFM, MMF and FFF threesomes, all have been spectacular experiences and all very different from the other. There have been gay, straight and bi participants so naturally the dynamic of the different flavors are highly unique. I am not going to say they all went 100% smoothly, but the one thing they all had was a heightened sense of the other participants as well as an over abundance of communication & negotiation; before, during and after.

    The before is critical to set expectations and limits. Those could range from "don't touch me there", to "don't kiss my <insert person> on the <insert body part>", to emotional expectations. Is this a one time thing, is this a try-out for a continued relationship, is it a slumber party or do you want the third to leave, etc… Talk about the things that worry you and your partners – what are you afraid of. And for the love…get the STD and birth control questions/options out on the table, discussed and decisions made well in advance. During the play communication is really crucial to insure all parties are having a good time, no one is getting physically or emotionally hurt and all agree to proceed. I find myself "checking in" a lot with multiple partners. "Is this okay?" "You want to continue?" It does NOT have to be clinical and in fact can be very erotic. "What if I touch you here?" "Do you like it when he licks you there?". A wrap up conversation should happen within a couple of days, best within 48 hours. Ask the tough questions – what went well, what didn't go so well. What was uncomfortable, what was so mind blowing incredible. Emotional aspects are often ignored yet generally provide the most lasting effect. Were there feelings hurt, are there unexplained feelings happening, etc… I know this is a very over-analytical approach – however unless there are three strangers, emotions do get involved and need to be handled accordingly lest someone get really damaged and relationships go beyond repair. And choose your partner carefully, it does not have to be someone so tied into your life as a BFF.
    Yes, I can create a Power Point on the nuances of multiple partner sex acts. :)

  31. DarkTouch says:

    The internet (read: porn story sites) have taught me that MMF encounters are cries for the man with a small dick to be dominated by a man with a large dick while his wife is easily seduced by the power of 'the cock'. Being all around average in that regard, The internet has informed me that I do not actually belong in an MMF threesome and I should get back to work.

  32. Getchasome says:

    my husband suggested a mmf 3some too … only there wasn't anyone that I knew that I wanted to include … we ended up going to a swingers club … it took a few times before we found one that I liked lol … all in all the experience wasn't bad, but it also isn't something that I ended up being into … my husbands fantasy of all time is for me to have a live in lover and let him watch … yeah, that doesn't do it for me … one man is more than enough, emotionally and physically … I also had to explain to my husband that by him continually asking for the other man to be with me made me feel like he wasn't into me and was trying to give me away … I guess its how its presented and carried out … my hubs likes to watch, not always participate, so the connection with him was being broken … good luck!

    • That's a difficult situation. When your partners fantasy affects how you feel about yourself. I hope he understands the connection now. Thanks for sharing.

  33. I don't think it's an uncommon fantasy at all. It might not be common to "admit" that it's a fantasy, but I'm willing to bet that there are lots of guys out there that love the idea of their wives getting fucked by another man.

    Little drummer boy? "Cum they told me, pa rum pum pum pum"

    I think that emotionally I would have a problem with a close friend doing the deed. In fact I know I would. It would be awkward. I can picture myself in the garage drinking beer and playing music with the guy and thinking that he really is out of beat. I wouldn't be able to look him in the eye, or anywhere else for that matter.

    And Crissy, your anxiety and nervousness are a part of the thrill no? Embrace the nervous anxiety..

  34. I had a MMF threesome once or twice with the same couple of guys. We were all single and great friends, do it was great fun. There wasn't any of the emotional baggage of theirs,but I may have puppy-dogged around a little bit.
    It was fun and we laughed a lot through the awkward parts, but it had to be easier because we knew each other so well.

    • Sounds like you had the perfect set-up. I wonder how many threesomes end up either helping, harming or completely destroying a relationship.

  35. try starting at a swinger’s party. it will be at a neutral site, the party only lasts a certain amount of time so no awkward ending, many men to choose from, there are usually rules about being STD free (and proving it), birth control is available and encouraged, there are many people so finding someone you are both attracted to and who in turn is receptive to a MMF should be fairly easy, everyone is hip to NO meaning no and stopping if anyone is uncomfortable, there’s no rush to get started, so you have time to settle yourself and get into the mood, etc., etc., etc.

    just a suggestion.

    • That's how my mother and father n law got started. Swinger's Parties. It worked. Up until they got divorced. Things were never the same after that, but right up until then, they were on a roll. Nobody got preggers and nobody got scabs on their you know whats or had their brains eaten by worms, and they might have gotten divorced anyway. Who can tell?

    • Although personally I have never been to one – I know, *Shocker* – swinger clubs are growing rapidly and for some a great way to act out sexual fantasies.

  36. I don't think this is as uncommon as you might think. I've had two past lovers tell me they would like to have a threesome with another guy because they like the idea of watching me be pleasured. None of them had the desire to engage in play with other man, only to have him work in concert with them on me.

    I haven't done it yet, not because it's not interesting to me, but because I worry about exactly what Janice commented on earlier – what if the third guy is bad in bed? How do you politely get rid of him?!

  37. I can't even find one guy to sleep with, never mind two. This is way out of my league.

  38. Why does the dude jump away from you? That seems odd. Is it one of those reverse things where he's so attracted to you he pretends you just freak him out?

    Usually that's what elementary school boys too. But boys and men are kind of the same…

  39. oh girl…take it from me…they're a whole lot of work and awkward. but they can also be fun at times. I've never kicked anyone in the face or had the gas (whew) but I have found I too am constantly wondering if everyone is ok and forget my own needs. email me if you'd like to know more detail of what works & doesn't work :-)

  40. In some of the smuttier books I have read, it's not uncommon to see a MMF happen at least once, which leads me to think that maybe this isn't as rare a fantasy for women… either that, or the authors are doing a little personal wish fulfillment in their books! It's pretty hot to read, but I'm not sure how it translates to reality.

  41. Prior to being married to me my husband had one or two (or 4) threesomes with ladies and he said though the sex part is fun, afterward you are left with not one but 2 demanding chicks hogging the bathroom and eating all of your food. He said he would go to work and hope to return to an empty bachelor pad but instead be greeted by the chickenheads looking to be cared for and that part always crushed the fantasy of the sex. I think a threesome when you're single can be fun but once you're married with kids it can be dangerous territory. How do you tell a 3 year old that the other hairy guy eating his Cheerios at 7 in the morning is mommy and daddy's special friend who likes slumber parties? Even worse, why Mr. Hairy is sleeping in your bed.

  42. I had a MMF threesome once, and there is one concern you hadn't thought of: the other guy being horrible in bed. It happens! At least, it happened to me! It got to the point where all I could think of was how do I get him so stop doing whatever the hell that was without being incredibly rude??

  43. i think that threesomes in any way shape or form are someone saying that they're not happy with being in the relationship. for me, it's kind of like cheating, but i look forward to reading your husbands side of the story. i also would have a hard time separating love and sex. i also think i would be really strange if you're going to have a threesome, to have the third person be a close friend. i know that that's the only real way to be able to trust someone and know about their sexual past, but to me that's just weird.
    also, please keep in mind that this comment is just my opinion about threesomes. i'm just trying to understand them. in no way do i mean any disrespect. your private and sexual life is your own and i don't want to seem like i'm judging you. it will be interesting to get a man's point of view too though.

  44. iwinbeatthat says:

    Sex and love have absolutely nothing to do with each. I am ok w/ this scenario but I prefer a woman because it's nice to have an assistant to pick up the slack when I get bored and have better things to do.

  45. I think that scenario is best left to my twisted and incredibly detailed imagination. Call me a crotchety old lady, but I don't think those things ever end well. Threesomes in general. When there are real relationships involved anyway. I mean, not ALL threesomes. This isn't going well. Which PS is totally what one of you three would say if you ever went through with it. Maybe. The end.